Touching Stories of Influence

Angelique had been shopping in the city centre with some of her girlfriends. It was a sunny afternoon and all of them had bought some items. Before heading home, the group decided to have a last cup of coffee on a terrace overlooking the canals of Amsterdam. One of the women found an empty table and waved the rest of the group to come over. While Angelique was still making her way to the table, a man approached her and, after some polite niceties, asked her for her phone number. Some moments later when she joined her girlfriends at the table, Angelique could hardly believe that she had complied with the handsome strangers’ request. 

Peter and his wife were out for dinner. It had been a while since their busy schedules allowed for some quality time together, so he had chosen a special restaurant. The evening went well, the food was superb, as was the wine, and the atmosphere was splendid. Peter had not had such an engaging evening with his wife in a long time. When Peter payed the bill, he gave a generous tip to the waitress which caused his wife to smile and to raise her left eyebrow just enough for him to notice.

Tessa is a 21-year-old psychology student who works for her grandparents during the summer. Her grandparents have a shop at an open-air market and sell spices for aperitifs, such as Greek olives, dried fruits and vegetables steeped in different sauces. Most of the time, Tessa stands with a tray of goods in front of the shop offering free samples as a way to compete with other market sellers. Much to the puzzlement of her grandparents, whenever Tessa manages to entice a client to visit the shop, the average amount spent by these clients is markedly higher than during the rest of the year.

What connects these three short anecdotes is our inert tendency to react positively to human touch.

As a psychology student, Tessa knows that she can influence clients’ behaviour by briefly touching their upper arm or shoulder region. More often than not, people are not aware of her touch, which lasts no longer than a second or two, but it has a distinct effect on their behaviour. Comparing touched versus untouched clients, the former are more likely to enter the shop and, once in the shop, spend more money than the latter.

The man Angelique met at the terrace had increased the likelihood of obtaining her phone number by a significant percentage just by a slight touch on her upper arm. If he had asked her for a dance in a bar in the same manner, which is less confrontational for a woman, his chances would have increased by another 20%.

The waitress that served Peter and his wife had touched Peter only two times, once when he requested the bill and once when she returned the change; nevertheless, her tip markedly increased. This experiment has been replicated in several countries, and the conclusion is unambiguous—touching clients increases the tip, no matter if in Paris or Moscow.

The effects of human touch have been studied in great detail and in various contexts.

People who are touched by experimenters comply more frequently with requests (even if that means to guard the large, excited dog of a stranger), allow others to cut in line, are more open to accepting product suggestions and are more likely to sign a petition or to test products, drink more alcohol in a bar and reduce disruptive behaviour. Touching clients in a sales context not only increases sales performance but results in positive feelings towards the salesperson in consequent surveys.

While touching the arm or shoulder region of someone is generally associated with dominance, there is another body region that is sensitive to physical contact. It turns out that a light pat on the back of the shoulder—by a woman—activates a similar sense of security and support as was evoked by physical maternal contact in infancy.

No matter what people may think, decisions are, more often than not, based on emotions rather than deep analytical considerations. Emotions of security and support, even if illusionary and evoked on purpose, have been shown to increase the willingness of volunteers to accept higher personal financial risks than they would have done otherwise. All it took was a slight pat on the back.

There are some gender differences of which to be aware. It seems that women are touched more often, especially by other women or people they know. Men are not shy to touch strangers even if these strangers are other men.

While empirical research is telling us that touch can change behaviour, the use of touch to advance our own objectives is risky. Any behaviour which lacks genuine interest, emotion and congruent nonverbal signals is easily recognised and viewed as awkward. The takeaway from this article should be the understanding of how little it takes for all of us to be influenced, no matter how immune to persuasion we consider ourselves to be.